Transforming Organizations in Conflict

Conflict is any situation where one individual's (or group's) concerns or needs differ from another individual's concerns or needs.

Clients often call me when they are in the middle of a conflict. They or some members of their team are struggling. I can hear the discomfort in their voice. They are worried that the conflict is disrupting productivity and relationships. They are usually right.

While I feel compassion for what they are experiencing, I am excited for them. I know I can help them and their team. I know conflict's potential to transform people and organizations. When managed well, conflict raises the stakes and potential for growth. I'll provide a real example.

A client is implementing a very large technology project. Three of the top leaders from different functions of the organization are working with IT to customize software. They all have their own "take" on what outcomes they want from the finished product. They cannot come to agreement. Soon they are not talking. Weeks turn into months. The IT implementation is behind schedule because they won't attend meetings together but individually keep advocating for their needs. Messages are left on voicemail after hours, e-mails are going back and forth. Finally their CIO calls me. He is frustrated (understatement). Let's be clear, these are smart people. This is a good organization.

I meet with each leader individually. There are tears and anger. They have forgotten that they are dependent upon each other. They are disconnected from how much the people that report to them interact with the other functions. They are so busy "defending the fortress" of their division, they don't see that the well being of the "kingdom" is in jeopardy. I design an intervention. The goals (in this order):

1. They connect to their own experience.
2. They connect to their colleagues' experience.
3. Empathy replaces anger. There is room to listen and reconnect to their collective goal.
4. They reconnect to their vision for the organization and what they are called to do as leaders.
5. We implement the next steps to allow them to understand each other better, keep communication open and the project moving forward.

As we go through the process I ask them to treat their own experience like a research project. They are to observe what they are learning about themselves in conflict and write down what they experience. No judgement is required at this point. From what they learn they can decide how their stance in conflict is effective and not effective. They decide what they would like to change about their own conflict practices going forward. The leaders leave with two plans: one is for moving forward with the IT project, one is for their own development.

My intention is to leave leaders more competent after working with me than before. To sustain this, they need to improve their self-awareness. If leaders change their "way" in conflict they can transform how their organization deals with conflict. They are role models for their organization, and how they play together often sets the stage for how the people that report to them play together. Leaders are like the hub in the wheel. The work we do together reconnects them to this.